How to Avoid Going Your Own Way to Hell

by Pastor Paul Wolff

The prodigal son left his family to go his own way. He soon repented of his sin.

Lord, to You I make confession:  
I have sinned and gone astray,  
I have multiplied transgression,  
chosen for myself my way.  
Led by You to see my errors,  
Lord, I tremble at Your terrors.

Yet though conscience’ voice appall me,  
Father, I will seek Your face;  
Though Your child I dare not call me,  
Yet receive me in Your grace.  
Do not for my sins forsake me;  
let Your wrath not overtake me.

For Your Son has suffered for me, 
giv’n Himself to rescue me,  
died to save me and restore me,  
reconciled and set me free.  
Jesus’ cross alone can vanquish
these dark fears and soothe this anguish.

Lord, on You I cast my burden –  
sink it in the deepest sea!  
Let me know Your gracious pardon,
cleanse me from iniquity.  
Let Your Spirit leave me never;  
Make me only Yours forever.

(Hymn verses from “Lord, to You I make Confession”, Lutheran Service Book #608, or The Lutheran Hymnal #326, Public Domain)

This past Sunday we sang the above hymn in church, and as often happens, I found myself singing this hymn in my head throughout the week. This is why it is so important to sing good hymns in church so that even throughout the week our thoughts are properly focused on confessing our sins to God and trusting in Jesus to forgive us. What a great tragedy it would have been if we had sung some catchy little ditty which whitewashed my guilt and praised me for some supposed good in me rather than praising Christ for His work to redeem me and save me from my sins. I don’t want such nonsense being repeated in my mind because none of that can save me. It might make me feel good to sing about how good I am, but it is a lie and can only lead me to be content in my sin on my way to hell. Hymns like the one above are good to focus my attention where it belongs: on Jesus as my savior from sin. This is what gives true comfort and peace, and keeps my feet on the right path.

As I repeated this hymn in my mind this week I was struck by the line in the first verse which says, “I have … chosen for myself my way.” In this hymn this is my confession of sin. “Lord, forgive me for choosing to go my way instead of Yours.” This is completely opposite to the way of the world. The world’s ideal is similar to what Frank Sinatra used to sing, “I did it my way” (and countless other similarly themed songs from Sinatra and others). The world thinks it is a virtue to “go your own way” and to do what you want when you want. That seems to us like “freedom,” but it is actually much closer to hell than to heaven.

God condemned the Israelites saying, “In those days there was no king in Israel. Everyone did what was right in his own eyes.” God sent judges such as Samson to rescue them.

In the Biblical book of Judges the wickedness of the Israelites is summed up by the last verse of the book, “In those days there was no king in Israel. Everyone did what was right in his own eyes.” The problem wasn’t a lack of a king. God was the King of Israel, but the people didn’t recognize God as their king and did what was right in their own eyes, but they did wrong in the eyes of God, their king. The pattern in Judges was that the people would turn away from God, then God would send an enemy such as the Philistines, or the Midianites, or others, to come and steal their wealth and their food and generally make life difficult for them, until they repented and turned back to God asking Him to rescue them. God would send a judge to defeat the enemy, and as long as the judge lived the people remembered God and prospered. When the judge died the people quickly forgot God and turned to idols and the cycle began again. It was a strong condemnation of God’s people that “everyone did what was right in his own eyes.”  

There is some evidence in popular culture that choosing your own way is a bad thing. In 1976 Lindsay Buckingham wrote a song for Fleetwood Mac titled, “Go your own way.” It was a breakup song and he was essentially saying to his lover, “If you will not go with me on our way together, then you can go your own way, but I am going a different way.” This is a beautiful but sad song highlighting the painful effects of sin and betrayal and regret from broken relationships in this wicked world. To those who listen carefully, this song clearly communicates the heartbreak Mr. Buckingham feels over his lover’s betrayal. The problem is that the heartbreak is wrapped in such a beautiful song with the chorus repeating, “You can go your own way” that I can easily imagine people listening to it casually, but not thinking about it, might say, “Hey, I can go my own way! That is exactly what I want to do.” It may seem fun at first, but before long they find themselves sad and alone living a hellish life on earth and wondering why things aren’t as great as they had thought they would be.

There is also an early 21^st century movement known as MGTOW – “Men Going Their Own Way” which is a reaction against feminism. Feminism is, at its heart, essentially fascism for women. Feminists want to exercise power and control over men, but because that goes against the natural, God-created, order of things, no man will ever be content to let feminists have their way. There is a sense in which MGTOW is a move toward rationality, because an extreme male fascism is just as bad as a female fascism, and going your own way seems like a way out of the political power struggles of male-female relationships. However, men and women going their separate ways is sad and lonely. God made the woman for the man, and the man for the woman, and He blessed this marriage with children. If all men and women went their separate ways the entire population would be essentially dead in less than 50 years, and completely dead in no more than 120 years. This is just one example of how going your own way leads to death. There are many more ways.

The loving father forgave his wayward son and rejoiced at his return.

In Christ’s Parable of the Prodigal Son (Luke 15:11-32) the younger son seeks to go his own way and do what he wants. The loving father mourns for his son as if he were dead, but he lets him do what he wants, but prays that he will come back. We see this because once the wayward son realizes that he has sinned and is worse off than a pig, the father is out on his porch looking for his son and sees him coming when he is still a long way off. The father then runs to meet him and rejoices that not only is the one who was lost now found, but he who was “dead” is now alive! In the parable, the loving father represents God, who lets us go our own way if we want, but warns us that our self chosen way does not end well. Proverbs 16:25 says, “There is a way which seems right to a man, but its end is the way to death.”

Sin always leads so sorrow, suffering, and death. Since all people are sinners, we all, by nature, seek to gratify our sinful desires rather than seeking to do good for our neighbor. Even when we think we are seeking to do good for our neighbor, we are more likely doing evil than good. Scripture says, “The wages of sin is death.” (Romans 6:23) This is why we must repent of our sins and confess to God, “I have … chosen for myself my way.” The hymn verses above then look to Christ for forgiveness, healing, and restoration from all that has been broken by sin in our lives. We seek God’s face (v. 2) because He is the one who made us, and can restore us through His healing power, and through Jesus, He is the one who gave Himself to suffer and die to save me and restore me to set me free from the deadly consequences of sin (v. 3). It is Christ also who has sent the Holy Spirit to give me comfort in the midst of the loneliness and sorrow of this sinful world (v. 4).

Psalm 32:5
“I acknowledged my sin to you, and I did not cover my iniquity; I said, ‘I will confess my transgressions to the Lord,’ and you forgave the iniquity of my sin.”

2 Corinthians 5:17-21  
“Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation. The old has passed away; behold, the new has come. All this is from God, who through Christ reconciled us to himself and gave us the ministry of reconciliation; that is, in Christ God was reconciling the world to himself, not counting their trespasses against them, and entrusting to us the message of reconciliation. Therefore, we are ambassadors for Christ, God making his appeal through us. We implore you on behalf of Christ, be reconciled to God. For our sake he made him to be sin who knew no sin, so that in him we might become the righteousness of God.”

Psalm 51:3-11  
“For I know my transgressions,
and my sin is ever before me.  
Against you, you only, have I sinned  
and done what is evil in your sight,  
so that you may be justified in your words  
and blameless in your judgment.  
Behold, I was brought forth in iniquity,  
and in sin did my mother conceive me. 
Behold, you delight in truth in the inward being,
and you teach me wisdom in the secret heart.  
Purge me with hyssop, and I shall be clean;  
wash me, and I shall be whiter than snow. 
Let me hear joy and gladness;
let the bones that you have broken rejoice.  
Hide your face from my sins,
and blot out all my iniquities.  
Create in me a clean heart, O God,  
and renew a right spirit within me.  
Cast me not away from your presence,  
and take not your Holy Spirit from me.”